Storms of the Soul

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“Let us therefore come boldly unto the throne of grace, that we may obtain mercy, and find grace to help in time of need.” Hebrews 4:16

    “Oh, that you brought me through a day like yesterday, Lord. Oh, the storms in my soul.” I thanked Him. I praised Him. For His mercy!

I was doing my usual morning prayer walking. Walking up and back in my prayer room. Thanking God once again for His amazing mercy. Oh, such grace! He had woken me up after a day of mighty powerful storms. Winter storms. In reality, the weather in the southeast had been awful. Storms almost never happen in winter here. But we had had thunderstorm after thunderstorm. Some areas had been hit by tornados. So thankful. The worst for me was nothing. I had learned to count my blessings. My yard had little ponds of flooding. My septic overrun. My plumbing I had to use to a minimum. I was using plastic containers as a  toilet. Still, so blessed. The day before, the sky couldn’t stop pouring forth fury. Dark. Ever wet.

Stormy. Just like my soul had been. Tired, cranky, irritable, then temper. Impatient. Fear. Worry. Doubt. Restlessness. Anger. Then rage. The old rage. The rage I have so wanted to bury in a casket and never see again. But still it returns – sometimes. Oh, what a stormy day. Interspersed with prayer, Bible study, precious time with the Lord, reading inspirational books to help me in my walk with the Lord. But then more storms. From the sky. And in my soul. The way life is. Never consistent. The weather changes. Stormy days come. They seem sometimes they will never end. Like the sky will never shut off its faucet, the clouds will never move out of the way, the sun will never return. That’s how my soul had felt. Stormy.

But this is why I was thanking God the next morning. It was still dark outside, the rain had stopped temporarily, more rain and possible storms were forecast. I didn’t know what the day would bring from the sky or in my soul. But I knew God had poured out His mercy for me once again with His mighty love and awesome grace, that He had covered my sins once repented with love, that He had wiped away my wrong with Christ’s righteousness, that He had given me this new day a fresh start to continue learning how to follow my beloved Jesus. Just as the heavens had poured forth the storms and rain, God who reigns forever had poured out His mercy once more. How humbled I was that a wretch like me would not go unnoticed when I cried out to the Lord once again I needed His forgiveness. Oh, how He showers His love upon me. Upon those who repent and seek Him. My soul was quiet this new day. At peace. Drenched in His love. Like the ground flooded with water, my soul was flooded with the power, might, hope, Truth, promises, blessedness of the torrential reign of the love and mercy of my forever King on high. Oh, thank you Lord!

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