The Song I Sang to God

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“And we have known and believed the love that God has for us.” 1 John 4:8

“I will sing to the Lord as long as I live;

I will sing praise to my God while I have my being. May my meditation be sweet to Him;

I will be glad in the Lord.” Psalm 104:33-34

I believe I have the worst singing voice of any person I’ve ever met, let alone likely in the world. When I was under false prosperity gospel teaching, I was essentially taught I could have anything I wanted if I had enough faith. I was told I just had to “believe God”, wave my magic prayer wand, and I would have it. The singing voice I have today all these years later is proof enough God doesn’t respond to magic wands. My singing voice is as pitiful as ever. But the Lord knows my heart for Him, my uncontrollable passion for Him, and I believe He looks past my terrible voice and enjoys all the silly songs I make up and sing to Him as I take my long walks with Him as I sing forth my love to Him. Like the day these words came tumbling forth in my singing. Totally unplanned. They just burst forth, and I was so shocked by them I grabbed my mini pad of paper and pen from my fanny pack and wrote them down. Because I knew there was – and is – a message in this.

“Thank you Lord for loving me so much that you say NO when I want you to say YES,” I sang happily aloud.

My eyed tear up even as I write these words. For I have never known anyone who is as capable of being as negative, self-pitying, and complaining as I can be when I revert to my old sin nature rather than putting on my new life in Christ, and I have thrown plenty of temper tantrums through the years when I have cried out to the Lord incessantly for something and discovered He had no intention of answering my cries the way I intended.

Once I wrote down the words of my little song, these words followed.

“Because you always know what’s best.”

I put away my paper. I put away my pen. I resumed my walking. My little song was all done. But my heart was filled with joy, and is even right now as I write.

Why? Because not until that day my little song came pouring forth do I believe I truly understood that it is THE LORD’S LOVE that compels Him to say NO when He says NO. His NO’s are in HIS WISDOM, in HIS MERCY, by HIS GRACE, with HIS COMPASSION, in HIS SOVEREIGNTY of seeing and knowing the beginning from the end and the end from the beginning. It is by HIS SPIRIT, and through HIS WORD, in HIS HOLINESS, in HIS PERFECTION, that He knows and chooses exactly when to say NO to His children and exactly when to say YES.

I have struggled terribly at times with thinking God doesn’t love me, or God doesn’t care, or God doesn’t understand my needs and desires, etc., when God says NO. Not so! It is IN GOD’S LOVE!

He is the PERFECT FATHER whose PERFECT LOVE is why sometimes He simply says NO.

Oh, if we would only comprehend His unfathomable love for us! Even when God says NO because we have been disobedient, He is acting in line with the truth that God ALWAYS knows what’s best for us and for His Creation.

What joy to consider His immeasurable love! What joy to know He would say NO when He knows it’s best to say NO. He also knows when to say YES.

May we learn to trust Him, and to trust His love for us, trusting He will answer our cries however He desires as Lord, Lord of all!

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